Day 3 Failure
I’m in day three, and it’s already time to discuss failure. I’ve failed… and you know what? …it’s totally fine. I expected it. I welcome it. I’ve finally learned to dance with failure the right way. My goal was to go for this thing 100%, and I was hitting 5-10% over time. What am I talking about by this? Well, there are certain key activities which lead to a much healthier state of mind. That healthier state of mind leads to greater productivity, a happier life, more fulfillment, greater clarity of purpose, etc. etc. One activity is mindful meditation. Studies are clear that 30 minutes a day of mindful meditation has significant effects of the physical structures of the brain associated with focus and emotional integration (they increase in size) and anxiety (it shrinks). Neuroplasticity is a topic for several posts to come. For now, I’ll just say that I’m not doing everything I should be. My goal is to meditate 15 minutes in the morning and 15 minutes in the evening. Every time I’ve done this regularly, I’ve been far more focused, slept better, been calmer, and much happier. Dan Harris wrote a book called 10% Happier, which is an excellent, pragmatic look at the effects of meditation.
At any rate, for days 1-3 I have meditated in the morning, so I’m at 50% efficacy on my meditation, when my goal was to go for it 100%. There are many other things I’ve failed to do as well. However, setting a goal like this isn’t about perfection, it’s about raising the bar and taking a shot. If we are thoughtful about our goals, meaning we take the time to look them over at the end of the day and see what we did and did not achieve, then consider what caused us to succeed or fail, we move in the right direction. If we do this consistently, even in failure, we rise.
The biggest key is to have no shame in failure. Shame is one of the most toxic emotional states. In fact, it’s so useless and toxic, shame should be considered a ‘throw it out the door right now’ emotional state. There’s so much more to discuss with Shame.
For right now, I’ll say that I’ve been getting far more done in terms of getting my mind and my career going where it should be in the last three days because of this project than the last 45 days or so, which is great. And, since I’m looking over my goals and not allowing shame to shut me down, I expect to continue to improve in my application.
I’ll close this post down with a favorite quote of mine from George St. Pierre…
“The goal is not to set your goal to high and fail to reach it. It’s is to set your goal too low and reach it.”
By striving big, we push ourselves into realms we otherwise never would have achieved.